Losing the baby weight!

Gross realization

2009-10-28T14:18:00.002-06:00

Today was WI and look at me go, I STS AGAIN this week FFS! If I have hit a plateau already I will be so upset! I know that I cannot lose weight if I dont exercise but I have been and staying OP! So I am giving it one more week before I try extra exercise or start eating my flex or something!

The menu today:
Breakfast:
Honey Nut Cheerios (2pts)
Green Tea (0pts)
Lunch:
2 hamburgers (lean ground beef) 3oz's each (8 pts)
served on 2 portobello caps (0pts)
2 slices cheese (2 pts)
Big Salad no dressing (0pts)
Supper:
1 bowl chili (5 pts)
Snacks:
1 Activia yogurt (2pts)
12 almonds (2pts)

I still have 3 pts for the day I am going to try really hard to make sure to get them in.

Tonight as I was going through the pantry putting some things away I saw a container of Crisco... and I can recall when I was a little kid (i'm talking no more than 8?!) that I used to eat shortening right out of the container... and I wonder why I got fat? How messed up and disgusting is that?!

Activity today will be after L goes to bed:
30 mins cardio (2 pts)
20 mins shred (4pts)

L's new snow suit

2009-10-23T15:55:00.003-06:00

Just because hes so cute and I love love love this snow suit :

You cant see them but the little hood has ears and there is a teeny tiny little tail on the bum! So cute!

Oops!

2009-10-17T17:16:00.002-06:00

Well, I had planned on going shopping today but looks like I will have to do it tomorrow... spent the whole day with L's grandparents on his daddy's side! AND we got to hang out with my other baby boy Mister Duke! It was awesome! Duke gave L a whole bunch of kisses (hes not so good with kids and he only ever kisses me and C so it was a big deal that he was really good with L)

Eating went great today:

Breakfast:
All Bran Bar (2pts) ... wasnt that hungry
Lunch:
Spaghetti leftovers (6 pts)
1 cup 1% milk (2pts)
Supper:
Lean cuisine chicken carbonara (6pts)
Steamed Veggies (0pts)

I still have 8 points left but ive not really felt hungry! I do plan on having a snack before I call it a night.

I also still need to do some exercise for the day (the visiting was so good that I can forgive myself for not getting in a whole bunch of AP's today)

Otherwise its been a great day :)
I plan on watching a movie before bed and hopefully seeing my BFF tomorrow :)
Good Night everybody!
Till next time

C

Can I just get liposuction instead?

2009-10-16T11:03:00.003-06:00

Seriously?! Lipo... anyone?! I am still 100% OP today but I am just having one of those "gee wouldnt it be nice to just be thin like yesterday" days! I hate when I get frustrated in my head!

Breakfast:
Protein Shake (5pts)
Lunch:
Protein Shake (5pts)
Supper:
Havent really decided yet... I have 12 points to play around with
Snacks:
1 cup pineapple with cool whip (2pts)

AP: 30 day shred, 1 hour on treadmill = 8AP

On a positive note, where today is the half way point between starting the shred and when I will post my results I tried on my target outfit for the month. I know its a tad bit silly seeing as its only one month but I figured you never know it may suck me in enough to go down a size and/or fit into some clothes that I am still trying to get back into. So I put on a pair of size 11 pants today. The only thing is they have stretch in them... I got them on, they fit but I dont wear clothes with stretch ever so who knows if they are more like a size 12 or not?! But all of my regular dress pants fit a lot looser than they have been so its possible that in the next 14 days I will fit those quite well.

The true test will be squeezing into this skirt that I have... it is a size 11 and I know it really *is* an 11 because its denim. I bought it probably 8 or 9 years ago and it was too tight to even wear it then its just I was too ashamed and embarrassed to have to say I need the next size up! For now my target is to wear those dress pants comfortably by the end of the month. I know I probably wont even wear that skirt when it does fit but I will be taking a picture in it because it will be a big deal to me to fit into it.

The top I tried on today is one that I bought a few years ago... its a large and it did fit when I bought it! Now I am just trying to get back into it. I still have a little ways to go for it to fit nicely, but I will try it on again in 2 weeks to see how i'm doing.

Not planning on being too busy for the rest of the day. L is taking a nap right now, we cleaned most of the house this morning, I am just finishing up some laundry and when he wakes up will make our beds etc. Tomorrow we are going to visit his grammy and grampy and possibly will go shopping. I checked the flyers and Walmart has formula on for half price so I will be stocking up! I will also be needing groceries. I am thinking of possibly making chili this week but I will make a list tonight :)

Thats it for now. Till next time
C

30 Day Shred - Day 15 & WI results

2009-10-15T08:21:00.002-06:00

So its been a few days since ive had a chance to write! Ive still been doing well. I am somewhat bummed about yesterdays WI, I was a STS. But the way I see it is, I have probably gained some muscle (I know I have I am so much stronger than before) and it was thanksgiving (still counted my points but used AP AND flex which I never really do) so I will take it over a gain!

As for the shred. O.M.G. I am so glad that I didnt watch level 2 until the morning of day 11( I was going to do level 2 that night) and let me tell you it scared the hell out of me, so imagine if I watched it on day one haha. Anywho it is very tough!!! I am still waking up sore every morning but it feels so good!

Today's menu:
Breakfast:
1 cup strawberries & 4 TBSP's cool whip (2pts)
Lunch:
1 cup WW spaghetti (3pts)
1/2 cup pasta sauce (2pts)
2 cups steamed veggies (0pts)
1 cup 1% milk (2pts)
Supper:
I have some chicken in the freezer that needs to be used up, I think I may have a panini! I also plan to get in that second glass of milk!
Snacks:
Yogurt (2pts)

So last night I bundled baby L all up and we went shopping. I needed to get him some formula but picked up the cutest snowsuit for him! Its chocolate brown and blue and has baby tigger on it. It has a little tail and ears on the hood (so cute!)

But I felt kind of like an ass hole while I was out. I dont know why this happened, being overweight I find I have a little bit more understanding and lack of judgement towards people who are over weight... but it is like every single person I walked by who was overweight, I noticed! Like REALLY noticed! I didnt look at them and think anything rude, but I dont understand why I was thinking to myself, things like "wow that person is so big". Am I becoming a stuck up skinny bitch? I sure as hell hope not! I have never really had this happen to me before? I dont know maybe I am just more aware of myself and I wish that I could help everybody lose weight and be healthy and happy or something?! I have no clue! I just know that being over weight makes me so unhappy and I can only imagine how people much larger than me must feel. I mean I am only a size 12 I know it could be so much worse but I know how unhappy I am even in a 12... I know there are people out there who would do just about anything to fit into a 12! Ok I am ranting now

Hopefully I will be back tomorrow, L has been having a really bad week so it is hard to get on the computer to update! Haven't forgotten about you guys though!
Till next time
C

30 Day Shred - Day 10

2009-10-10T06:56:00.002-06:00

So today is the last day on level 1 of my Shred. I am looking forward to trying something more challenging. My body hasnt 100% adapted to Level 1 but I feel if I move on now and push my body harder it will only yield better results!

Ive already had breakfast - oatmeal and 1 cup of 1% milk (5pts)

I havent planned out the rest of my day yet but tomorrow and monday I will have to plan well as I am invited to my cousins place for turkey tomorrow, and monday with my mom. I am not very worried. I am content with not having dessert! I like to avoid using my flex points and activity points but at least with activity I know ive at least earned them. I just want to be super careful because I really want to hit my 10% this week.

I am one of those people who cant keep herself off the scale! Yesterday I was already showing myself down half a pound so I only have 1.6 pounds to go!

Well I must be off, its time to tidy up the house and get on with my saturday!
Till next time
C

30 day shred - day 9

2009-10-09T15:00:00.003-06:00

So today has been an excellent day. L has been so good that I got to go back to sleep not once but twice this morning hahaha! He is enjoying play time in his swing while I write this and wait for my supper to finish cooking.

Wont get to my workout until later this evening. Helene left a comment on yesterdays post asking what I count my AP's for the shred as. I count it as high intensity because I push myself really hard to work up a sweat and according to Weight Watchers if you start sweating in 3 to 5 minutes its high intensity! Last nights work out was really good, I got through the whole thing without stopping (sometimes I will skip the last few lunges or push ups etc) but yesterday I did it all!

I also plan on doing 30 mins of another cardio video I have tonight for an additional 2 AP so todays activity will put me in at 6!

Todays Menu:
Breakfast:
2 oranges (2pts)
Lunch:
2 Meatloaf muffins (4pts)
1/2 cup brown rice (2pts)
Steamed Veggies (0pts)
Snack:
1 cup 1% milk (2pts)
1 all bran bar (chocolate chip) (2pts)
Supper:
1 pita pizza with chicken, lots of veggies and feta cheese (9.5 pts)

That puts me at 21 pts for the day. I still have 3 left over but probably will not eat them.
I usually dont ever touch my AP or Flex points unless I am starving! But I do make the effort to try to eat my daily points. I wont over eat if I am just not hungry!

I also tried on an old pair of gym pants today and all I can say is *whistle* my butt looks super hot! I can definitely see a huge difference in my stomach, bum and thighs just from a little over a week of doing the shred!

Well, it is supper time so thats it for now!
Till next time
C

30 Day Shred Day 8

2009-10-08T07:10:00.003-06:00

So last night I did my shred after L went to bed. I find it to be quite easy to do any time of the day but I have gotten into the habit of doing it a few hours before bed.
I found I pushed myself a lot harder last night (I think its because I just had such a good OP day and wanted to make every second of it count). Oct. 11th I AM going up to the next level. I am not tossing the idea around anymore I am just going to do it!

Today will be day 8 of the shred, and I couldnt be more proud of myself. The morning after the first workout I hurt so much but I pushed through it! I am also going to do 30 mins on the treadmill today (2AP) and possibly one of my other 30 min cardio dvds sometime today (2AP also) so if I can get all of that accomplished I will earn 8AP today (HOLY SMOKES!)

I find it funny how I just feel like I am an active person now?! I make sure I earn at least 1 AP every single day! So long as I am moving my body (on purpose) then the day is successful in terms of exercise. I always feel so awesome when I take L for a walk and the only other people I see on the street are very fit runners!

The menu today:
Breakfast:
1 Chocolate chip all bran bar (2pts)
1 cup of 1% milk (2pts)
(its like having a chocolate chip cookie and glass of milk for breakfast, it was awesome)
Lunch:
2 meatloaf muffins (4pts)
1/2 cup brown rice (2pts)
steamed mixed veggies (0pts)
Supper:
Haven't decided yet but I do have 14 points to play with for supper and a snack! I really need to go get groceries!! I do have cooked chicken breast in the freezer... probably will figure something out with that!

Thats it for now!
Till next time
C

WI DAY!!

2009-10-07T06:48:00.002-06:00

So WI was this morning, down 2.1 lbs since last week bringing me to a grand total of 19.4 pounds lost! I can really see my neck is getting slimmer and my collar bone that I lost during pregnancy is coming back :)

I did day 6 of the shred last night. Overall its getting easy enough that I somewhat feel I should move to the next level but there are 2 moves that absolutely kill me. PUSHUPS why the hell cant I make it through pushups damn it? Then there is also this side lunge with shoulder raises holy smokes that one kills the front of my shoulders! But I am waking up the next day not feeling any serious pain like days 1 2 and 3!

Today I plan on doing day 7 of the shred, 30 to 60 mins of cardio (its raining out so it will probably be treadmill) and I wont count it but I need to go shopping today so I will be walking around the grocery store and walmart a little later. The way I see it is so long as my butt is off the couch and moving, the longer the better even if I dont count the AP.

Well I better stop writing for now and go tend to my child!
Till next time
C

30 Day Shred - Day 5

2009-10-05T16:51:00.003-06:00

Just finished up workout #5 of the shred. Still some moves that feel challenging, others I am getting used to. My endurance has definitely improved, I am not panting nearly as bad as I was on day one but it is still a very intense sweaty workout.

I am positive that I will move on to level 2 on day 11!

Well I am off to do some cardio, total points eaten today 22 (sorry being too lazy to type out my menu today), total AP earned will be 6

30 Day Shred - Day 4

2009-10-05T07:50:00.002-06:00

I didnt have a chance to log in yesterday to update but I did get in my workout. Surprisingly its only been 4 days and I can notice a big difference. I am ALMOST to the point that I can survive the first set of girlie push ups. Which I know may not seem like much becuase it is only 30 seconds but seeing as I couldnt even do a girl pushup to begin with, this is a huge deal to me.

The first three days I woke up sore every single day and it hurt like hell to go up and down stairs, today is the first time I woke up and dont really feel any pain. The way the shred is set up is for you to move on to the next level when you are ready. I am thinking I will continue at level one until day 10 and do level 2 for 10 days and if I get strong enough level 3 for 10 days. I still find some of the moves difficult on level one so I will be there for a few more days for sure!

Eating was fine yesterday, had lots of fresh fruits and veggies! Got all my water in also.

I will try to get on later this evening to update on how today went but I am sure it will go just fine. If the decent weather holds up I will do some cardio outside with baby L.

30 Day Shred - Day 3

2009-10-03T16:16:00.006-06:00

This is going to be a short post! I haven't done my workout yet but will be doing it as soon as I get this post up. My legs still hurt quite a bit today. Going up and down stairs hurts, and oddly enough going down stairs hurts the most! I am also having a hard time getting up and down from/to the floor to play with baby L. But it is that good kind of hurt that makes you feel proud of yourself for working out!

I promised to upload some pics to do my comparison with at the 30 day mark, and I was feeling pretty tired of having my gorgeous mug all over the Internet in workout clothes so I just took pics in what I was wearing! so I have a front, back and side view of me in dress clothes. I will take pics again in 30 days to see if there is any significant improvement as well as post my new measurements then. Please be reminded I just had a baby so I still have a gross belly!

So I posted the measurements the other day but these pics here are me at 196.2lbs.

I have been tired today as I didnt sleep much last night so my eating has kind of been crap.
I had a bowl of pasta at lunchtime (8pts) and a turkey sandwich for supper (5pts)

I am off now to do my workout. I will have 6AP for the day as I plan to do an additional 30 mins of cardio after my shred.

Till next time
C

30 Day Shred - Day 2

2009-10-02T08:02:00.002-06:00

Well I had an interesting morning. Through the evening last night I felt my thighs burning a little bit. This morning I woke up with my thighs on fire, one calf was sore, my lats were sore, and one ass cheek.... haha apparently when I just sit around on my butt all day I only do it on one side?!

The workout was not so bad today. I cannot do pushups to save my life, even the girlie ones are too hard but I still did them! I just had to go way slower than the dvd. Again by the end of it my arms are so sore that I could barely shampoo my hair but I feel great knowing that I am making the effort to finally get in shape and be healthy.

Todays meal plan:

Breakfast:
Protein Shake (5pts)
Lunch:
Protein Shake (5pts)
(I should be pretty much done with this container of milk after this hahah thank god)
Supper:
2 "meatloaf muffins" (4 pts)
Pasta sauce (1pts)
1 cup whole wheat pasta (3pts)
Snacks:
Probably popcorn, ive been wanting it for days!

If the weather clears up this afternoon I will be taking L for a walk outside for some fresh air, if not I am going to hit up the treadmill for at least a half an hour. So far Ive earned 4AP, a half hour of walking will be another 2 if I do a full hour, another 4!

Thats it for today! Till next time
C

30 Day Shred - Day 1

2009-10-01T13:05:00.003-06:00

I know it is some what early to be posting today but I plan on going to bed early tonight and since Mister L is taking a nap I've decided to just post now.

Well Day 1 of the shred ... not nearly as bad as I expected it to be... in ways. I have read lots of reviews and most people said that this dvd would kick my ass, that you will be pouring buckets of sweat and you will be so sore you cant move.

I will break it down the way I experienced it:

Warm up.... not so bad... for about 30 seconds then I start sweating... awesome that means I am starting to burn up some calories.

Moving on to the actual workout it is set up in a 3-2-1 pattern, 3 mins of strength training, 2 mins of cardio then 1 min of abs. This pattern is repeated three times. First exercise, push ups! I had to do girlie push ups (any of those who know me, know that I definitely lack in the upper body strength department) but I managed to get through them. After the push ups I felt like I could easily stop right there, my arms were about ready to give out.

One thing that is great about this dvd is that Jillian constantly reminds you not to take breaks and if you do no more than 5... that's right FIVE seconds! So I move into the next exercise.

When it came to the exercises that involved hand weights I thought maybe mine were a bit too light (again I have no arm strength and my weights are 2 pounds) by the end of the dvd they felt like they weighed 25 pounds! I could barely lift them the whole way up! (There is one girl in the video that is doing the modified beginner version of the exercises so that is also a plus).

Second set, wasn't too bad. I was feeling the burning in my muscles and was breathing very heavily. I had to take very quick breaks in between exercises to drink some water but I didn't actually stop other than that.

By the time the video got to the third set I actually said out loud "I hate you so much right now!" I was definitely feeling it! However, I made it through the whole workout without any major *I need to sit down* breaks.

After the workout my arms were killing me, I took a shower immediately afterwards and I could barely lift my arms to shampoo my hair! I did my workout at 9am, and its now 4:15pm, my arms no longer hurt but I can definitely feel my thighs! We will have to wait until tomorrow to see if I feel more sore. Ive seen reviews where people say the next day it hurts way worse. I was a little concerned about arm pain because I have a 3 month old son who still needs to be lugged around often but it hasn't been that bad!

At this point my recommendations to anybody who reads this:

Have a HUGE bottle of water next to your mat (I drank 1.5 L's of water in 20 mins I was so hot and sweaty).
Make sure you can take a shower after you do this, you WILL be sweaty even if you only do the exercises half assed!

I am thinking I will do my workout every morning around 9am. That worked very well for me today, L was good enough to sit in his bouncy chair for the 45 minutes it took for me to exercise, shower and get ready for the day.

As for being OP, here is my menu for today:
Breakfast:
Protein Shake (5pts)
Lunch:
Protein Shake (5pts)
Supper:
2.5 "Meatloaf Muffins" (5pts)
3 cups steamed veggies (0pts)
Snacks:
Haven't decided yet, but where I have had an early supper I will be hungry later in the evening and I till have quite a few points that need to be eaten. I am thinking I may have nachos (I bought baked nacho chips, low fat cheese and fat free sour cream, so I could make it into a semi healthy snack by adding lots of veggies on top.)

I was hoping along with doing the shred that I would still get in my usual hour of cardio everyday, but today its been kind of gloomy so I didn't take L for a walk. I also whipped up a big batch of meat loaf muffins this afternoon so I could freeze them. I will be doing some form of cardio activity this evening. I may try to get on the treadmill or I may do one of my cardio dvd's. But so far I have earned 4AP.

Day 2 of the shred tomorrow!
Till then
C

WI #9

2009-09-30T16:42:00.002-06:00

WI went awesome this morning! I am down to 196.2 (-3.8lbs this week). So that puts me 4.2lbs away from my 10% and 15.2lbs away from the lowest weight I was the last time I was on WW, before I got pregnant. So not too shabby at all I must say.

Today's Menu:
Breakfast:
Protein Shake (5pts)
Lunch:
Protein Shake (5pts)
Supper:
Turkey Sandwich with cheese (5pts)
2.5 cups steamed veggies (0pts)
Snacks:
100 cal aero bar (2pts)
1 cup fresh pineapple (1pt)
1/2 cup each kiwi fruit and strawberries (1.5pts)

AP:
So far ive done a 60 min walk with baby L (4 AP) and will be doing another 30 mins of arms (2 AP)

I am getting kind of sick of having protein shakes twice a day but I have been buying milk by the gallon and that is a lot for one person, if I just have shakes twice a day it will be gone sooner (hopefully before its expiration date).

So I start 30 day shred tomorrow. My plan is to still do 60 min walks everyday as well. I have heard that my ass will totally get kicked by the shred so we will see how that goes, but when it comes right down to it, I usually walk outside so L can get some fresh air.

As promised I am going to post my measurements tonight, and will compare again in 30 days after the shred. I went a little overboard and measured all over my body but whatever! (I only started taking my measurements 3 weeks ago and have just been doing them each week with WI so far im already down 11 inches in the past three weeks!)

So as of today:
Upper Arm: 13.5 inches
Fore Arm: 9.5 inches
Bust: 39.5 inches
Waist: 42.25 inches
Hips: 44.5 inches
Thigh: 25.75 inches
Above Knee: 20.5 inches
Calf: 15.25 inches

I also want to take some pics in my workout gear just to see if the shred will really make THAT big of a difference.(Here's hoping) I will probably take and post those tomorrow morning!

Well I must put my kiddo to bed, hes starting to fall asleep in his swing set (dont worry I am a good mommy, hes already had his bath, fed, "teeth" brushed, bedtime stories and snuggles!)

Till next time
C

The dreadmill is my new BFF

2009-09-29T15:12:00.002-06:00

Well this morning the forecast was giving rain! That's just fine, I knew this last night so I decided to go on the treadmill. All I can say is boy im glad I have access to one becuase holy smokes while I was getting in my cardio for the day it started to pour!

Menu today:
Breakfast:
Protein shake (5pts)
Lunch:
Turkey Sandwich with cheese (5 pts)
Snack:
1 Orange (2pts)
Supper:
Lean Cuisine Chicken Club Panini (7pts)
2 100 calorie aero bars (4 pts)
Snack:
Havent had much for vegetables today so will be having raw veggies with 1/2 cup tzatziki (1 pt)

AP:
60 mins treadmill - 4AP
and plan on another 4 AP with strength training.

Tomorrow is WI day, from my sneak peaks I am down about 3.5 pounds. I will definitely be sure to post tomorrow but if I am down another 3.5 that means I am only about 4 lbs away from my 10% which I am very excited about (10 weeks to get my 10% would be amazing!).

Dont forget the biggest loser is on tonight (YAY that means I get my pedicure hahaha) and thursday will be the start of my 30 day shred so I will also be posting measurements and hopefully will have the chance to take some "before" pictures. I will be posting pictures for comparison to my old ones as the weight comes off but I want specific before/after pictures to see what the 30 day shred can really do for me in one months time!

Seeing as I choose the 30 Day Shred for my fitness goal for October, I think that I am going to try to start (and actually finish this time) couch to 5K for the months of November and December. It seems to me if I remember correctly that C25K is a 9 week program so I am very much so considering this to be an option.

Till next time
C

How long does getting thin take?

2009-09-28T17:02:00.002-06:00

Today was a pretty good day. Baby L woke up at 630 had something to eat then went back to sleep till 9am. It was a good sleep in! He had an appointment today and I had lots of errands to run so we left the house around 1245pm and didn't return home until almost 330pm. But we got all kinds of great things accomplished.

We went and got some groceries today. I stocked up on some snack foods! I got some cadbury thins bars, as well as 100 calorie aero (with caramel) and kitkat bars. The other day I had a craving for popcorn so I also picked up some plain microwave popcorn.

Here is just a quick list of the rest of what I picked up:

Fresh Fruit (Oranges, kiwi, strawberries, and pineapple)
Fresh Veggies (Broccoli, cauliflower, cucumber, carrots)
Frozen mixed vegetables
Supplies to make WW friendly nachos (Low fat shredded cheese, FF sour cream and baked nacho chips)
Crystal Light
Lean Cuisine Panini's (they were on sale!)
Pita's
A loaf of WW bread
Extra Lean sliced turkey
FF cheese slices

I also had to go to walmart to pick up some things for L. So we had a pretty good afternoon out and about!

The menu today:
Breakfast:
Protein shake (5pts)
Lunch:
Lasagna (8pts)
Supper:
Turkey Sandwich with Cheese (5pts)
Snack:
1 Activia Yogurt (2pts)

And my AP's:
L and I went for a walk outside (after the rain clouds cleared up) 60 mins (4AP)

Planning on doing 2 of my exercise dvd's in about 45 minutes time which will be another 4 AP.

I had a good laugh when I was reading L his bedtime story. I picked him up the classic Winnie The Pooh books so I could start reading to him at bedtime and tonight we were on the one where Pooh goes to visit Rabbit and upon leaving gets stuck in the door on the way out. Here is the quote that made me laugh when they were trying to get Pooh unstuck:

..."We shall have to wait for you to get thin again."
"How long does getting thin take?" asked Pooh anxiously.
"About a week, I should think."

If only!
Till next time
C

Boring day part 2

2009-09-27T11:01:00.003-06:00

Holy smokes, I am so incredibly bored this weekend. It doesnt help that it is super gloomy outside (supposed to rain this afternoon) so I also feel like eating because of that.

Baby L's grammy and grampy dropped by to see him today so I got to visit with Mr. Dukie Dukes. I miss him so much!

I dont really have much to talk about today because I am just so bored but if everything goes well I will be heading to see one of my BFF's this evening. Havent seen her since last april!

Here's the menu:
Breakfast:
1 Chocolate Chip All Bran Bar (2pts)
Lunch:
Chicken Teriyaki Stir Fry with Rice (5pts)
Snack:
1 Chocolate Chip All Bran Bar (2pts)
Supper:
Boiled dinner (5pts)
with 3 L's of water because it was so salty, but I ate mostly vegetables!

So my day is looking pretty pitiful food wise. You may have noticed that I desperately need groceries which I plan on getting tomorrow if my monkey man feels up to it!

AP's, well its gross outside today, hasnt rained but I do not want to be out of the house so its exercise dvd's tonight after the baby goes to sleep. I will do at least an hour (approx 4 ap's) and if I am being really ambitious an hour and a half for the 6 AP's I try to earn everyday. Since WI day ive done 4.5 hours of activity!! How awesome is that?

I find this go with Weight Watchers I have been looking at exercise less and less as a chore and more and more as "so long as you are out moving your body, you will lose weight". I dont know why it was such a hassle before but I make sure to move my body in some way shape or form every single day on purpose! It is definitely paying off because its becoming a good habit and my body just does not want to let go of the weight unless I am physically active!

Thats it for now, hopefully tomorrow is more exciting!
C

What a boring day!

2009-09-26T11:56:00.002-06:00

I realized today another reason (as if I didnt have enough) why this town depresses me. Baby L and I went for a walk this afternoon and there was absolutely no traffic! Its a saturday for crying out loud! When the town pretty much shuts down on the weekend that screams loud and clear that it was an excellent idea for me to move to AB. I miss it so much, cant wait to go back. I am only staying here for my little man to meet his family.

Today's Menu:
Breakfast:
Protein Shake (5pts)
Lunch:
Cheesy Chicken Pasta (6 pts)
Supper:
Going to Boston Pizza!
Having some sort of Caesar wrap, a salad and water (10 pts)

So we are heading out to BP around 430 for supper this evening. Afterwards I get to see my other baby boy (Mom wont let me have Dukie Dukes here so he is staying at his grammy and grampies!) Then sometime this evening I want to fit in some more activity. Ive already walked with baby L for an hour so thats 4 AP, I will probably do some lower body work for another 2 pts.

Not a very exciting day at all so I am going to end it here.
Till next time
C

Friendly Competition

2009-09-25T16:25:00.003-06:00

So I was really bright today! It all started on facebook, my status read "C seriously needs to shower, cardio + me = a sweaty MESS! but at least my ass is getting smaller". My brother and one of our colleagues (we work at the same dealership) have recently started going to boot camp and trying to get fit together, so reading this they posted some comments. K said "Is this a new thing or are you just trying to keep up with S" (S is my bro). So being the cheeky bastard I am my response was "No S is trying to keep up with me, hes trying to lose the baby belly too". Well from there all hell broke loose.

Well not really I am a tad bit over dramatic haha. S proposed that "the first one to have a 6 pack out of the three of us wins". So K being competitive was totally for it and I am not about to turn down a challenge. Only thing is they are both boys so chances of them losing a tonne of weight way faster than me is very likely. However, I highly doubt that the two of them would lose so much as to be a totally ripped 6 pack abs kind of guy. SOOOOOOO If I am really lucky I will win hahaha. If either of them win the two losers take the winner out for steak dinner. I don't eat steak so if I win, its TBD but it will be "Worth my while" says K. haha

So I will keep you posted on that but it should be fun, a little competition hasn't hurt anybody... well except anorexics! But the three of us do not anorexics make!

Here is my menu for today:
Breakfast:
Protein shake (5pts)
Snack:
WW banana muffin (3 pts)
Lunch:
Sweet and Sour Chicken stirfry with rice (5pts)
Snack:
Activia Yogurt (2pts)
Supper:
Haven't had anything yet, not feeling very hungry but I have 9 points left so I really ought to have something. I may have some whole wheat macaroni, with chicken and tomato sauce.

Activity - Haven't done it yet but it will be 30 mins of weights (got to get the buff arms so I can lug Baby L around. (I referred to him as little L this afternoon and got that jamiroquai song stuck in my head!) and will also do 60 mins of cardio for a total of 6 AP's.

I will end this post with this - I recently ordered the 30 Day Shred from amazon.ca. I have decided that I am going to start it on October 1st. So I will be posting before and after photos as well as my before and after measurements. I am not expecting a miracle but the dvd itself claims you can lose up to 20 pounds in 30 days. I just want the benefits from the exercise. Hopefully gain some muscle, boost my metabolism, gain some strength and lose some inches.
I will be able to post my review on October 31st! I am pretty excited for this, I have heard that it is very difficult!

That's it for now!
C

Time to play catch up

2009-09-24T17:11:00.003-06:00

Ok so here's the deal. I havent posted in over a year and I am going to do a 20 second "catch everybody up to speed" run down on my life.

I got pregnant last september
Gained back all my weight during pregnancy (highest weight while pregnant was 239lbs)
Had the baby (It's a boy!! 7lbs14oz)
Waited until baby L was 5 weeks old to start trying to lose weight
Started weight watchers (again) 8 weeks ago at 213.5lbs
Loss to date 13.5 lbs (as of Wednesday September 23)

So in an effort to keep myself going as well as trying to be supportive to a friend who is also trying to lose weight I decided to start up with my blog again. It always used to help keep me motivated so heres hoping it will this time as well.

The good news about being back on weight watchers is that now because I have my son I find I push myself a lot harder to stay on track because I am now a role model!(Scary!) I want to give him the best start in life and teach him good healthy habits from the get go. So in order to be the best mommy that I can be I am being/becoming the healthiest mommy I can be.

So here is the plan: I want to try to update my blog daily. For the sake of my friend I might post what I am eating everyday ... it might help throw out some meal ideas and if anybody will still be reading this thing it helps keep me accountable. I also will post what ive done for activity. One thing that is a fact of life for me is that especially since I have had a baby I MUST move my body every single day or the weight will not budge. I find now more than ever my body is fighting me most of the way because it is going through such a huge change trying to adjust to having just had a baby. However I am working my ass off to make sure I am doing my absolute best. From the looks of things I cant be doing too bad becuase I feel almost 14 pounds in 8 weeks is excellent!

So here is what I had today:
Breakfast :
Protein shake (5 pts)
Lunch :
Protein shake (5pts)
Snack:
1 fat free Activia yogurt (2 pts)
Supper:
Pita Pizza with chicken, veggies and feta cheese (8pts)
2 cups raw veggies(0pts)

I am allowed to have 24 points a day but today I only had 20. I know a lot of people freak out a bit when they hear that I am having protein shakes but it is helping me to get my milk products in. I try really hard to stick to the 8 good health guidelines so this is one way to do so for me. I dont do this all the time but it helps mix it up. I also take a supplement as well as salmon oil pills (I am hoping the oil will help my terribly dry skin!)

For activity I did 25 minutes of strength training this morning and 60 mins of cardio after supper for a total of 6 AP! I also guzzled down my 3 liters of water today :)

The last thing im going to report on today is that I gave up drinking soda (again, thought I had it kicked last time I gave it up but started up again) the day that I started weight watchers. So today is day 58 without it. I honestly dont think I will have it again because it is something I dont want L to have. When he starts eating real food I am the one who has to bring it into the house so if I set the example I am hoping he will follow my good example as he grows older :) If not at least I will know I did my best!

Thats it for now!
C

C25K Day 1!

2008-07-05T14:53:00.002-06:00

So I know it may seem like ive been on hiatus again but I promise I havent, my hunnie just happened to take the internet with him when he went to work this week (we have one of those USB port ones that we share between our two computers)

So the last week has gone okish... but today I was being lazy watching tv and I noticed a nice breeze and I decided to get off my ass and actually do my first couch to 5k work out. Duke even got to come with me :) It was very worth it, I am glad I made the decision to get up and get out there.

My thoughts on it so far... it wasnt too difficult, I figured it would be tough. I was out of breath at first but I just kept breathing and working through it, I did feel the muscles in my thighs by the time I finished up but nothing unbearable. I very well think that this program will be doable.... just have to see how difficult it gets but the great thing is if its too hard I can do-over a particular week.

So overall day one of C25K is a success!

WI and update

2008-06-24T18:56:00.002-06:00

So I didnt update yesterday because I didnt go online after work. WI showed me as down 1 pound (GRRRRR I was looking forward to seeing 181!!) So I was showing 183 but this morning when I weighed it was showing 181 again (I took 183 becuase it was still down one pound!) But for sure next week I *hope* I will be out of the 180s.

Yesterday's Menu:

Breakast:
FF yogurt - 2 points

Lunch:
Booster juice smoothie - 8 points

Supper
11 points - casserole

Todays is pretty much the same thing but so far Ive only had a smoothie. I have left overs from that casserole in the fridge waiting for me when I get home. I will probably have a yogurt and fruit as well.

In C25K news - its been raining since sunday I am so disappointed. Too bad I didnt have a tread mill (sigh)

It's raining, It's pouring

2008-06-22T12:55:00.003-06:00

Well as you can tell by my title, it decided to rain today. I am all but impressed! I was really hoping to start my running today. The only reason why I am not going out in the rain is because (as some of you may know) I live in an area where we have all of 2 paved streets in the town. Thus rain = mud = messy = not ruining my new shoes on the first day.

So instead I am going to have to switch things around! I am going to do my 20 min basic pilates DVD and maybe go on my gazelle (gag... i hate that thing its soooo painfully boring!!) But I will get some AP in this afternoon.

I also have to clean some more. I ended up not doing anything yesterday in terms of house work *oops* heheh.

I have planned what im having for supper so I can already put my menu up for the day :)

Breakfast:
FF blueberry yogurt - 2 points

Lunch:
Subway (again im an addict)
Foot long Turkey with mustard - 12 points

Supper:
1 Serving Campbell's Cheesy chicken and rice casserole - 8 points (yum)

Total: 22 points
If I find myself really hungry after supper I still have 3 points left for a snack plus whatever I earn for AP today. Worst case scenario I can make a big yummy salad for a very low amount of points (depending if I put dressing or not)

My exciting news for the day I did go to town and got myself a Timex watch. As you probably figured out I am doing my C25K outside so I need some way to track my time. I got a Timex because it has a stopwatch/timer feature and will beep at particular increments so I will know when to start running/ walking again! Its black and pink :) It also has a pulse feature so im pretty excited about that too because it was only 40 dollars!!

WI tomorrow (actually excited for this one!)

Wonderful day

2008-06-21T18:48:00.002-06:00

So I put on my new shoes today and have been wearing them around the house to help break them in. I am seriously going to do workout number 1 of C25K tomorrow. I figure my workout week is going to look like this:

Sunday - C25K + 20 minute walk
Monday - Pilates
Tuesday - C25K + 20 minute walk
Wednesday - Pilates
Thursday - C25K + 20 minute walk
Friday - Stability ball
Saturday - Day off

This week I work evening shifts as well as the weekend. I have a hard time with the turn around between working Thursday night and having to be in for Friday morning so if I do C25K Sunday Tuesday and Thursday I will be done for the week and Friday after work I can just do my stability ball routine to have an easy end to my workout week.

Today's eating and activity was great:

Breakfast:
FF Yogurt - 2 points
1 Banana - 1.5 points

Lunch:
Stouffers Turkey Dinner (tv dinner) - 5 Points

Supper:
Cheeseburger - 14 points (needless to say once they are gone I am looking into the vegetarian burgers from M&M's because they are low point!)
Fries - 4 Points

Total: 27.5 points

Activity:
Stability Ball dvd - 1 AP
20 Mins walking dogs - 1 AP (very leisurely)
10 mins stair stepper - 1 AP

Total: 3 AP

I have also had 2 liters of water so far today :)
WI is in two more days... as of this morning I appear to be down about 1.5 pounds. Looking forward to tomorrow :)

I'm happy, Hope youre happy too!

2008-06-20T20:48:00.004-06:00

What a great day today (see told you it would be)
The sky is looking a little bit stormy right now so we might have a thunderstorm today(I hope the hell not the roommates dog scratched at my door last night cus of a thunder storm... when i got up this morning she had actually managed to remove a CHUNK of wood from the door frame ...its at least 15 inches long and 1 inch wide at its largest point! Not a nice way to wake up in the middle of the night when you are scared of thunderstorms and have your own dog to comfort)

Otherwise today I went and paid for the tv stand got some new sneakers (WOOT! I am super psyched now!) and since I could literally eat subway everyday I got a foot long sub to eat for breakfast and lunch LOL

Breakfast:
6 inch turkey sub - 6 points

Lunch:
6 Inch turkey sub - 6 points

Supper:
HUGE salad with a little bit of vinegrette and chicken - 3 points
Low Fat french fries - 6 points

Snacks:
Hot chocolate - 1 point
2 small bananas - 2 points
1 WW bagel - 2 points
Peanut butter = 2 points.

Total:28 points

So I used 3 flex points today but mmm PB and bananas on a toasted bagel... sooo worth it to go over my daily total by a few points.

I spent the rest of my day cleaning. I vacuumed then steam cleaned the carpets in the hallway and living room, vacuumed/cleaned out the car and truck, dusted, did a little laundry, washed down the walls in my living room. I walked the dogs then I started having some down time.

Tomorrow is laundry, steam cleaning the carpet in the bedroom, moving furniture around to clean the carpets under them and I might do my first c2k5 work out becuase I am very excited about it now that I have new sneakers (they are super pretty blue and white) they even have reflectors on the back for if i was ever running in the dark (which I wouldnt around here... too many wild animals in this area) But still... i have reflectors hahah

MMM milkshake

2008-06-19T19:45:00.003-06:00

Today was crazy busy because of the sale... I feel kind of bad for my coworker because shes stuck working the weekend alone and its going to be INSANE!! But I really could stand the weekend off.

Today I feel very satisfied in terms of hunger.

Breakfast/Lunch:
Booster Juice "Very Berry" smoothie - 7 points

Supper:
French Fries - 5 points
Big sandwich - 6.5 points

Total - 18.5

So I have 6.5 points left. I am surprised that ive not been starving all day because I missed breakfast. I decided to sleep in till 6 this morning (normally I leave my house by 6!) So I didnt have time to pack anything into my purse to bring with me for my drive.

When I got home I emptied all of the garbage out of my car and my sweeties truck. I also cleaned the surfaces in the truck (dash windows etc) and I plan to vacuum the truck and my car out tomorrow. My car is soooooooo filthy!!

Tomorrow I am going to do some shopping. I have to cash my cheque, pay off whats left oweing on our new tv stand arrange a day to pick that up, get a new pair of sneakers (for starting C25K... my roommates dog pooped in mine, I threw them out!) I really should tell roommie that I want him to pay for my new shoes ... anyway regardless I am going to have a great day tomorrow! I have decided its going to be awesome :)

To use the last of my points today I think I may make a chocolate milkshake :) Its times like these when I am happy mom bought me a magic bullet blender thing for christmas LOL

Busy Day

2008-06-18T19:29:00.003-06:00

Oi Today was such a busy day at work. I am very proud of myself for taking Duke for a small walk just now. I got home and didnt expect to leave the house again but I promised Duke this morning we would walk when I got home so after I made myself some supper then did dishes we went for our walk.

So I have had a good OP day so far:

Breakfast:
1.5 cups of honey nut cheerios - 4 points

Lunch:
Booster juice "Strawberry Sunshine" Smoothie - 7 Points

Supper:
Sandwich - 6.5 points.

Total: 17.5 points.

So ive got 7.5 points left for the day. Its only 7:30 right now so I will probably have a snack before bed. I bought some bananas today so maybe I will have some FF yogurt with a banana or something. I also have some WW bagels and cottage cheese that need to be eaten as well.

I have also had 1000 ml's of water today so I want to try to manage to guzzle down another 500 mls before bed

My Exciting news for the day. My new tv stand arrived at the furniture store yesterday... I got paid today so I am going to pay the rest of it off on Friday and schedule a day to go get it (cant go until my sweetie comes back from work).

Practice week

2008-06-17T18:32:00.002-06:00

So I am thinking this week is going to be my intro to being back on track.

Not that I plan on going over my points or anything but I am trying to make sure that I track, drink my water, get my AP's, make good choices and plan! I dont want to be too hard on myself but I need to get back into the swing of things and I think giving myself a week to "get used to it" before I get too hard on myself if I

Next week I am going to count as week one back OP (even though im going to be OP this week... )

But anyway here is what I have had for food today. I am allowed 25 points per day.

Breakfast:

6 inch turkey sub from subway (with cheese) - 6 points

Lunch:

Hamburger with cheese,ketchup and mustard - 12 points

Snacks:
Cheese and crackers - 3 points
FF yogurt - 1 point

Which puts me up to 22 points so far today. Ive also had 1000ml's of water so far... I plan on getting another 1000 in before the day is out.

In an effort to save money I am going to start packing lunches to take to work. something really great is that ive learned to actually like mustard so I will save points by bringing sandwiches without mayo!

I am not sure what im going to do for activity today but I plan on doing something before bed tonight!
Today has been a success!

My bright idea

2008-06-16T19:42:00.002-06:00

So last night just after I posted I had an amazing idea.
if I can do this running thing, i mean really do it and learn to run and stick to it... if each week that I completed the workouts for the C2K5 I put say... 10 dollars into a jar if it only took the 9 weeks to finish the program thats 90 dollars I would have saved up.

If there were a few weeks that I have to repeat in order to not feel like im pushing myself too hard then that would be even more money. My bright idea is use this money I save up to buy a really great pair of running shoes as a gift to myself. This will be a big accomplishment for me and I think it is definitely worthy of a reward!

WI today showed me down 3 pounds from last week (uggh i went back up to 187 last week) so im at 184 today... im really hoping this exercise and PLANNING that I am doing will get me over this hump. I want to get to goal by christmas so I am going to have to do the work to get there.

I dont remember who it is on the ww boards but in their siggy they have "if you always do what you always did, you will always get what you always got" and this is so true. I need to step things up a notch and I know that I can do it. I just have to plan well. I did go to the grocery store today and picked up a variety of low point foods so we will see how this week goes.

Lastly for this post, I am going to try to start updating everyday and putting my food log on my blog. It helps give me the accountability!

One day off is not enough!

2008-06-15T17:46:00.002-06:00

Well it has been about 2 weeks since Ive updated but everybody probably knows what Ive been up to - the usual!

Work has been going well but I am just exhausted this week. Today is my one day off so I slept in until about 9, got up and walked my puppy for about an hour. When we returned home I did the dishes, scrubbed the bathroom and started some laundry. I am hoping to get some energy to do a bit more house work before the day is done.

My sweetie goes back to work tomorrow after being rained out for a week so I need to make sure the laundry gets finished so I can help him pack his bag.

I work 730-430 shifts this week. It is due to be my long weekend this weekend coming however its a big sale at work and I might have to work Friday Saturday and Sunday... if this is the case its another 20 hours or so but I am just exhausted, I could really stand a good weekend off. When I go to the bank to discuss my loans I am thinking of opening another account just to put money in as a savings account... if I can save some money while paying off my bills things will be golden.

Now weight update. I am still hovering around the same mark... I fluctuate between the same 3 pounds right now. I seriously think my body is trying to tell me now that I need to start working on my fitness. So my goal for the next few weeks is try to get some sort of fitness routine going. I think that if I am burning some extra calories it will be the boost my body needs to start dropping the weight again.

Even so, just starting to exercise will help my body because I will be able to tone up. Some of my body parts such as my arms are just a little bit droopy but I know exercise will help that.

So my big idea is... I want to learn to run. I have never been able to run ever in my life. Lots of people on the WW boards have said wonderful things about the couch to 5k program (http://www.c25k.com/) and I seriously think it would be a good thing to try. If I can just get out there and do it I can guarantee great things will happen to my body!! I hope that I can bring duke with me when I learn to run so he can learn to run next to me. This way he gets some exercise too :)

The other thing I need to get back into is my pilates. I love it! It is very relaxing and it is also something that can do great things for ones body. So I need some encouragement guys!! I need to get serious about this because ive got 45 pounds to go and I want to get there by christmas time!! Lets do it!

Simplicity at its best

2008-06-03T18:31:00.002-06:00

I rediscovered something last night - How much i really enjoy a mixed salad with ranch dressing.

Tonight for 6 points I am having a HUGE bowl of salad made up of:

Romaine Lettuce
Mushrooms
Green and red peppers
Onion
Tomato
Shredded cheese
and low cal ranch dressing.

All I can say is YUM! It has made for a very enjoyable meal. I have quite a few points left over today so if I am hungry for a snack later I may make some nachos :) All OP of course!

I didnt get online yesterday to update but it was WI day and I was down 1 pound woowhoo. I am well on my way to achieving my birthday goal weight.

I am sitting at 152 days pop free! How nutty is that? Pretty incredible I think... I am about 5 weeks away from the 6 month mark (july first will be 6 full months) I am just amazed with myself.

So goals for this week, keep walking the dogs everyday, stay within my points and count every bite and just take care of myself :)

"New" clothes

2008-05-30T21:08:00.002-06:00

Ok So this one is going to be short!

Ive been keeping very busy this week as its my week to work 56 hours. Add the 2 hours a day of driving to and from work to that 56 hours and that puts me at 68 hours of time from my week I've had to put in. So im pretty tired.

Anyway I did something fun this past weekend, I cleaned out my closet. I know it doesnt sound fun but when you are losing weight and have held on to "skinny" clothes because you swore to fit into them again its lots of fun

I will have to take some update photos in some of my "skinnier" clothes.

From the looks of the scale I am down about 3 pounds so we will see how it goes on monday!

Long Weekend

2008-05-24T09:42:00.002-06:00

All I have to say is hooray for my new job and long weekends. I am so tired today!! I am going back to bed shortly. I was hoping it wouldnt rain this weekend as I wanted to start working on my fitness (have we seen a common theme here yet? yeah thats right im lazy and exercise can be tough for me to stick to)

I dont like taking the puppy for walks when its raining because there are no paved streets so we both get covered in mud! But he sleeps on my couch and my bed so him being muddy is no good!

I dont really have that much to say, I lead a pretty boring life. I will update on monday when I wi

WI day

2008-05-19T15:19:00.002-06:00

Down a half pound this week which is down 6.5 pounds this month so im doing ok. Hopefully I will have a big loss next week, small .5lbs ones are hard on my ego haha.

Also I just realized that I havent had a single drink of any kind pop for 140 days WOOWHOO!

Hooray for long weekends

2008-05-11T15:01:00.002-06:00

So I must say the number one perk of my new job is every other weekend I get Friday, Saturday and Sunday off. Basically I work 32 hours one week and 56 the next to balance it out and give me 88 hours per pay cheque. Its pretty awesome.

It has been a pretty relaxing weekend. I came home to my house and did a tonne of laundry and cleaned the house. Back to work tomorrow so I will be going back to Bella's tomorrow evening.

So in weight loss news I snuck a peak at the scale today and this week I appear to be down 2.5lbs... we will see how it goes tomorrow morning. I was thinking about things last night and I have really goofed off big time with the whole getting to goal situation. I was hoping to be at goal by my birthday this year but it is not reasonable. I cant lose 45 pounds by august - its not healthy. So I think I am going to alter my timeline a little bit and hope to hit goal by Christmas. There are 32 weeks until Christmas so that gives me more than enough time if I can stay OP to lose the last of my weight.

My birthday goal for this year instead is going to be to reach 160 lbs. That's 26 pounds and if I have 2 really good weeks that I lose more than 2 lbs those weeks I will be right where I am hoping to be.

Its funny, I've actually lost a fair amount of weight and kept it off (maintained) instead of gaining it all back (or losing more sadly but its ok I will get there) and I STILL find it hard to believe that I will ever get to goal.

Don't get me wrong I know that it is not impossible because clearly I have lost over 50 pounds but I just cannot picture myself at goal. I find myself more and more looking into the mirror and admiring how well I've done but I just cant picture the image of me looking into the mirror and seeing what I would look like at goal.

So I am hoping that come christmas time I will be able to report that I have reached goal and maintained my total loss.

WI tomorrow!

Its offical

2008-05-06T18:00:00.002-06:00

Well I am ofically skinny.

Since I have a professional job now and need to wear dressy clothes everyday I went to go shopping after work today for a few more dress shirts as I only had about 5. I was trying to find Reitmans and I knew there was one a few blocks from work. Well I saw the sign for Reitmans, pulled into the parking lot but I pulled into the wrong enterance. I drove passed Penningtons and I had an "A HA!" moment. I was thinking to myself well if I cannot find Reitmans I can try Penningtons! Then I had a HUGE "AHA" moment.. I cant wear size 14 anything anymore!! So seeing as I cannot fit into plus size clothes anymore and have no need for the speciality stores I am offcally skinny !! WOOWHOOO!!

Happy News

2008-05-03T12:14:00.002-06:00

So last friday I applied for a few jobs. One was a car dealership and the main reason I applied to it was because I knew where it was LMFAO I am not familiar with the north or east end of the city so I stuck to what I did know. They called me back on monday, asked for an interview with me on tuesday. I went in, got the job and started my first shift on tuesday afternoon! How cool is that?

I worked tues-fri this week... and so far i love my job, im already trained adn get to work on monday morning all by myself *ooo scary!!* haha. I actually did the majority of the work yesterday by myself anyway ( I was left to tend to the desk for like 5 hours by myself so clearly they trust that I can handle the job haha)

But overall it should be a good gig, the latest I would work (on evning shifts) is 9pm. Week one is days, week two is nights and I rotate back and forth, every second weekend I get a long weekend (the week I work days I finish on thursday and dont have to go back till monday at noon!)And there is also potential for me to move up with the company, which is really awesome because who wants a dead end job!

I took a sneak peek at the scale and it shows me as down 3.5 pounds this week, so hopefully on monday I will still be seeing the same number (or lower!)

A year in review

2008-04-28T20:19:00.003-06:00

So I know it is a few days early but *happy 1 year anniversary* to me!

In the past year lots of crazy and exciting things have happened for me. The two big ones are that I got on track with Weight Watchers and lost over 50 pounds (although I could have easily made it to goal already if I could just REALLY stick to it hahah) and I moved pretty much the whole way across the country, away from my entire family and all of my friends to Alberta.

I have held a job for 10 months that I absolutely dispised by the end of it but I survived. I have a job interview lined up for tomorrow morning at a car dealership so that is very exciting (also exciting is the fact that I actually know how to drive in the city to said location LOL ...god I hate driving in Edmonton) So hopefully I will be able to report back with good news about that potential job. (I really hope I get it, I cannot even begin to describe how badly I want that job)

In the past year I have also been homeless... crazy I know but it happened for about a month!

I went home on a "vacation"... it wasnt truely meant to be a vacation as my cousin had passed away so it started out as a trip for a funeral but I had to make the best of times. Duke had his first (and hopefully LAST) trip on an airplane... it was more nerve wrecking for his mommy than it was for him.

I dont really have much else to say on this... other than for this next year coming I am hoping to a) get a new job, b) consolidate my bills (mom if you are reading this I have been thinking long and hard and I will be hitting up the bank as soon as I get my first pay stub!) c) try to pay off 50% of what I owe by next may (sounds crazy but I can live off of cheerios and salad if the need be LOL)

Week 1 back OP

2008-04-13T13:28:00.003-06:00

So I did sign back up for etools this week and my typical WI day is monday so I figured today would be a good time to update since tomorrow will technically be week two.

First of all I must say I feel awesome becuase I have exercised 5 days this week... tonight I plan on getting an hour walk with with my cousin and my dog will come along.(so today would be day 6 of exercise). If I get my full one hour walk in I will have earned... THIRTY... thats right 30 activity points this week!! I am so proud of myself!!

I havent really sat down to figure out any sort of schedule this time around ive just been doing the activity. I think that I may just do a little something every single day for now but I know taking time to rest is important... I just dont want one day to turn into two to turn into three where I am just starting out! (I am out of shape but not so out of shape that I cannot walk for an hour a day)

Exciting thing number 2 is that my tae bo dvd is at my cousins house and since I am home I can pick it up and give that another try. The last time I tried it I was 235 and way too out of shape to do even 10 mins... so I think I might give it a go now that I am over 50 pounds lighter and a little more active than I was to begin with.

Thirdly, I am going at the plan as if I didnt know anything this time around, I check all my points values before I even start to prepare my meal and really think about if I am willing to use x amoutn of points on a particular thing. Its been helpful for keeping me OP.

So thats all for now, from the looks of my body the exercise is paying off but I wont know number wise how much weight ive lost till I get back to my scale (i refuse to WI on somebody elses!)

Long over due update

2008-04-10T14:22:00.003-06:00

So It has been a few weeks since ive posted anything, mostly as I have been home and dont really have anything interesting to say. But, I do have some great news from the past few days that I just have to share.

1) I signed back up for etools and got back on track (no more eating whatever I want, the local food that I cant get in AB would have me 55 pounds heavier in no time if I didnt limit myself!!)
2) I baked up a storm over the last 2 weeks and I have decided that I have done enough baking so that will eliminate that temptation (althought I was very good and whatever I made I packaged it up and delivered it to friends and family to get it out of my house)
3) I have exercised for 3 days in a row and earned 18 AP this week so far!! This is my number one problem, sticking to an exercise plan on any sorts. So far this week I am kicking my own ass and intend to keep it up.

AND most importantly... I hit a new milestone with one of my personal goals. It is day 101 that I have not had any pop to drink!! how INCREDIBLE is that?

So overall I am feeling great! I dont have my own scale to weigh myself on which is making me sad but I am taking all the right steps to make sure that I am successful while I am away on vacation and also to make sure I am on track to reaching my goal. I know I will do it by my birthday. I am so motivated right now and I am going to bust my butt off to get there! I cant wait to get back to Alberta and get on my scale to see my progress (lol for all of you scale junkies out there you can imagine how weird this is because I do weigh myself a few times a week... sometimes a few times a day!!)

WI (early)

2008-03-21T14:52:00.003-06:00

Ok all so I decided to WI today before I leave for NS because I am not bringing my scale with me (how neurotic would that be?!).

So WI today 181!! I am only supposed to Wi on monday but oh well.

Wooowoo thats 54.5 lbs. only 45.5 to go.

I am going to be gone until april 15th so i think that I will just WI on the following monday as I normally would. I just dont want to start using somebody elses scale. So today is the 21 ...the monday after I return will be the 21 so lets aim for 10 pounds while im gone. I know I am going to get a tonne of activity in becuase I will be out and about alot with my friends and family and of course my puppy.

So if i am lucky my next weight update will be showing me around 170 *crosses fingers*

I will post most likely satruday afteroon or sunday morning to let you all know I got home safe

till then

Its a big week

2008-03-19T17:16:00.002-06:00

Hi everybody.

I know I havent really been around lately but here I am with an update.

My cousin passed away on sunday, so I will be flying back home this weekend. It is one of those amazingly bitter sweet situations. I am so excited to be able to go home and spend a few weeks with my family and friends (who I have not seen for almost a year) but the reason why I am going home in the first place is so sad.

Just from what has happened in my life in the past 5 years ... I know that I am allowed to be sad but I cannot let myself get into that horrible depressed state that I get into when things get tough. I am going to go home and spend time with my family because we need to (and should be together) right now and at the same time I am going to live my life to the fullest. I already have plans with my best friend for the day after I arrive home... our tradition, a sub from subway and the newest episode of "The L Word" (so for all of you L word fans who are reading do not forget Sunday night SEASON 5 FINALE!!) It will be so nice to have some of those little things that I cannot have here in Alberta. I have so many people who want to see me, I plan on making time for all of them.

I am very excited that an old friend who i had lost touch with for years will be home this weekend so I will get to see her... it will be amazing shes since had a baby and is engaged and all that wonderful stuff... I cant wait.

As for weight loss and being home... there are lots and lots of foods that I can get on the east coast that I cannot here. For example:

-Fresh Atlantic Ocean fish (YES normally I would eat it deep fried but I am going to be a good girl and bake it ...I am still eating it with tartar sauce though!! no ifs ands or buts LOL)

-A real donair with the good sauce - I know they have donairs everywhere but none are as good as home (to me at least) ... since donair meat makes me sick from being so spicy I wont be eating lots of this... one will be enough

-Rappie pie - Nuff said...

These things among many many others will be very tempting while I am home. But i have a plan

Duke is coming home with me so we will be going to the BEACH... yes the beach that is next to THE OCEAN (can you tell im excited) for walks... that is our place and I have missed it so much... just weeks ago i was crying because i wanted to go to the beach...so long as I can secure a vehicle we will probably walk on the beach everyday... if not we will walk around town everyday for sure and also mom has a treadmill so I will be able to exercise at home as well.

SO between the bad food I know I will eat, and the good exercise i am sure to get... it shoudl be ok... I am bringing all of my WW materials with me because I want this to be a successful trip home... I WILL NOT come back to Alberta heavier than I am the day I leave (I will seriously weigh myself on friday before I leave!!) I dont like to WI on anything but my scale but I am not being so psychotic as to bring it with me LOL so I will be watching very carefully what I eat and my activity etc.

I will be taking lots of pictures (which I was slack about sorry) while I am hanging out with my family and friends SO there should be update photos of me looking good in my street clothes soon!

OH and I also booked an appointment with my hair dresser back home for a cut (I know it was to be my reward for reaching 158 pounds but I trust her with my hair!! so you will all get to see the better side of me YAY)

Until next time !

(I will post the first chance I get when I get home so everybody knows im safe!)

Uhoh!

2008-03-11T01:00:00.002-06:00

I swear I havent been neglecting my blog I have just been busy AND lacking the internet.

Quick update, still losing down to 183 as of last week. I put on an outfit I havent worn in a few weeks and its bigger, im excited about that! WI tomorrow!

I am so sick and tired of my job as pretty much everybody knows so today was the day - I left my house at 9am with 40 resumes and drove to town and passed them out. I got a job offer within an hour but turned it down because the idiot did not understand the concept of "Will not work nights" (the girl who accepted my resume wrote in block letters right on it that I would not work nights!) To make it clear I explained to the silly man that if I loved working nights that much, I wouldnt be looking for a new job in the first place!

Um other than that, just life... I can walk outside again because its spring and the ice and snow is all melted off the roads, now I only have to deal with mud (with all the stains on the carpet from dukes belly I am *almost* starting to like the idea of snow and ice more because a wet tumm tumm is better than a wet and muddy tumm tumm all over mommys white carpet...and bed!)

So yes I shall update tomorrow possibly if I have any important news (such as if I get a job! haha)

Till next time

50 pounds

2008-02-25T08:09:00.007-07:00

WOOOWHOOOOOOOO I did it, I have lost 50.5 pounds! I weighed exactlyy 185 today! That means only 50 pounds till goal!!

Here are my update photos. I apologize for the angle and that my head is cut out but autotimer can only do so much hehe.
Also when I pasted the comparison pics all together they arent all the same size but you have to bear with me I dont have a photo editing program!

Look at how much better my back looks from 50 pounds ago HOLY COW!!!
And do you see that? I have the startings of a collar bone OMG!!! And can we say waist? I have a waist!! This is amazing. I also can see a big difference in my face...
I will take some nice pictures later on today of me in regular clothes also. I just wanted to get these up first thing for Shrunk instead of making her wait all day hehe.

So either tonight or tomorrow check back for other update photos. Seeing as I just got home from work I am not exactly "nice photo" ready haha.

Till next time :)

I Miss the internet!!

2008-02-24T08:38:00.002-07:00

WOW I use the internet more often than I think that I do!

Just a mini update
a) this week I am applying for MORE new jobs, I am praying that I get a new one this week so I can quit the hotel, its taking such a tole on me!
b)WI day is tomorrow... *fingers crossed* I may just hit my 50 pounds this week :D
c)It has been beautiful here which means I am able to walk outside again :) hooray

Also as you can see by my ticker I havent had a drink of any type of pop for 55 days!! So proud of myself!

Not much else going on but I will update tomorrow with my WI.

WI day

2008-02-19T03:22:00.001-07:00

Down to 187! 1.5 more pounds until ive lost 50 pounds, I so hope I hit it next monday!!

Nothing interesting to say today, no internet for four more days so I will update when i am back at work :)

Shemales and evading the po-po

2008-02-17T00:06:00.002-07:00

So last night I come back to work and am bored out of my mind...I realize tonight on the drive to work I didnt even THINK to update my blog haha. So I have 2 stupid stories then some stuff that might be more interesting.

1) last night I was driving 100 in a 70 zone and drove RIGHT by the cops! so when I get to the intersection just down the road I was so turning off the road becuase I figured they would follow me then pull me over ... well I took a right at the intersection and a random left somewhere on that particular road... the cops never followed me ...that or I lost them becuase I lost myself... I had no freaking clue where I was LOL 5 minutes of driving around messed up curved roads ive never been on before I found my way back to the road I work on.

2) tonight I am driving to work (dont worry I wasnt speeding) and I am turning onto
the street I work on and there is a political sign in the ditch (thats where they put it up, it wasnt thrown into the ditch) and I glanced at it and I swear it said "Shemale" I slammed on the breaks and did a double take LOL turns out it actually said "Schmale" ... I was a little disappointed when I realized I was wrong LOL I am amused by the stupidest stuff!

So I started applying for more new jobs, they arent in town though so I would still have to drive to and from work but I need out of nights. Other bad job related news - one girl is quitting and the other is having problems with her pregnancy so shes out on medical leave so I am so going to be guilt tripped into staying here I know it... but I gotta move on.

I dont really have much else to say other than I have been without internet for a week so thus the lack of blog updates however I am going to first of all - find my digital camera this week and then take some update photos to post to celebrate my 50 pounds lost woowhooo. So till then (or until I get something better to say lol)

For Asian Dragon

2008-02-09T05:42:00.000-07:00

Here is a pic of my puppy :)

Everything in my life is BROKEN today!!

2008-02-09T00:27:00.000-07:00

Oh boy, I had a great day today.

Firstly it snows all night and then the wind picked up so it was -29 with a windchill of who knows what (it felt like a -35 day to me!) So I dont know whether its a good idea or not to drive home... I went anyway it was fine, however I misplaced my mittens so it was DAMN cold for a while!

Fast forward to home. I get out the car and I brought my laundry to work last night so I had to unload that too. I struggle with these two huge bags but I get them into the house! I decide to bring the laundry downstairs then get duke to let him out to pee. Since this is me we are talking about go figure something is bound to go horribly wrong! I grab the bags ... one in front of me one behind me and I get to the stairs, which are somewhat narrow but I have seen worse! 2 people cannot walk side by side up them! There is no railing and the entire right hand side is entirely exposed (no wall or rail or anything). So I get about 8 steps from the bottom and the bag of laundry, whcih just happened to be the heaviest one, decidest that its going to slide by the edge where there is no wall then fall over said edge...

Lets do a little mental addition

Candace + Stairs + loss of balance = ouch. Thats right the bag pulled me to the right and i tripped when I tried to balance myself out so I fell down the stairs. At the bottom I get up and tripped over my own two feet and managed to somehow "land" on my big toe... I bent it over on itself and it hurt sooooo bad!!! I almost passed out (I have a shitty pain tolerance level, a really bad charlie horse can make me pass out... this was sooo bad) So I am rolling around on the floor holding my toe then I get to that point where I was blacking out so i rolled on my side and just breathed and I pulled myself out of it. After I realize that im ok and nothing is broken and I havent passed out I crack up laughing at myself. At this point I stand up and duke comes flying at me out of nowhere so clearly BFF woke up and opened the bedroom door. He got dressed after he heard the "crash bang boom OUCH" to come see if I was ok. I could barely walk on my right foot just because of my fresh injury hurting really bad but I went on with my day. After I got up the top of my foot has a bruise about the size of a toonie on it... but oddly my toe hurts inb the first joint, its bruised on top of my foot at the second joint so dont ask me how I did that! But yes It still hurts.

Fast forward again to when I wake up and figure out what to make for supper. I get my recipe out ask BFF if he would like it we agree that it would be a yummy change, I make my grocery list then head out the door. Get into my car, it wont start.. tried 2 times, go into the house yell to BFF for the keys to the truck (i was just going to run to the store in his truck then come home and deal with my car afterwards cus I was very hungry) He puts on his jacket to come help me, he asked to hear the noise my car made trying to start, I turn the key BAM it starts (go figure) fine, we let it run cus it was freezing out and for some reason my entire engine, battery ... everything under the hood was completely covered in snow?!?!
We go together to the store, come back, I turn off the car and go in the house.

Fast forward to 10pm. I get up from my nap shower pack my bag etc, 10 oclock is later than I usually leave but I slept in a bit, so I head out the door and get in the car, no lights no movement no noise... I go back in the house and tell BFF. He comes to take a look thinking I have a battery cable loose... it is dark and freezing out... he said he would fix it in the morning, he drove me to work. May I remind you its 58 kms each way and he has to come get me in the morning so thats 200+ KMS just for driving me to work and picking me up... I have 2 more nights this week.

Even worse... if my car needs to go to a mechanic:
1) I am BROKIETY BROKE BROKE!
2) He goes back to work 700kms away from home on TUESDAY :S
3) I would have no way to get to work until I could get my car back
BAH
Hopefully its just my battery but its fairly new... who knows... I hope he can fix it tomororw.

OH and thirdly the other thing broken in my life. My poor puppy must have had sympathy pains for mommy today becuase he hurt his leg today too... hes limping a little but it is probably from slipping on ice, if hes still doing it tomorrow I will call the vet but he will probably sleep it off (maybe just tender!)

I still cant believe I fell down the stairs haha

PS I havent had Pop of any kind for 40 days, Im adding a ticker to the side of my blog to track... my short term goal is 1 year no pop bah

Why? (long and dreadfully honest)

2008-02-08T00:23:00.000-07:00

Do you ever wonder why ? (queue music for hit show of the early 90's haha)
Seriously I was reading Howse6977's blog and she had a post about WHY. Why do you want to lose weight. So I got to thinking, hey I should ask myself why do I want this. But it made me think back to a post Susan made on the WW boards a while ago about how she wanted to get to the bottom of WHY she got overweight in the first place to try to help her better understand why she had been struggling with staying OP.

So since I am waiting for my laundry to finish up (yes I am at work doing my laundry because my washer at home is broken) I thought hey what fun would it be to think of my Whys and maybe that will help me beat the winter blahs, stop bingeing (uggh cant stop at all i dont know whats wrong with me this last week) and move forward cus I dont want to be fat anymore!

So here goes the fun!

Why am I fat?

Well I wasnt always fat! I do know this, however I *thought* I was fat. Ok yes I had some "baby fat" going on but I was not fat or unhealthy!! This is one thing I totally hate about society is how weight and fatness is such a Big deal (haha pun intended). I can remember in the 4th grade that we used to take swimming lessons at the local YMCA through the school. Once a week they would bus us to the Y and we would have our swimming lessons then go back to school to catch the bus to go home. Now this is going to probably break some hearts but I can remember that I needed a new bathing suit and my mom went and got me one and I was all thrilled and 2 of my friends got the same one as me but they had black and I had pink. We somehow got talking about sizes and weight... do not ask me why as 8 and 9 year old kids we were talking about this but we did. Anyway I remember I weighed something like 94 pounds and my friends were saying how they weighed 70 something pounds and clearly you can make the connection 70 ish is 20 some pounds lower than 90 pounds and nobody else weighed near as much as I did so there we have it I was the fat kid. Did I mention that I was probably about 5 fricken feet tall when I was in the 4th grade (My mom used to have to buy me clothes from the petite womens section in elementary school becuasse I was too tall for normal little girls clothes this I also remember clearly!) My mama reads my blog so she will remember buying me short women pants (lol poor Izzy, shes about as tall as I was in elementary school Big puffy heart ya Izzy!)

So yes back to my point no word of a lie I used to think I was fat in elementary school. Ask my mother, I grew fast, I was off the charts when I went to the doctor! But since I was a little kid and didnt know what I know now about health and growing I had no clue that I wasnt fat I just thought that the more you weighed the fatter you were! So thats my heart break story for the day. Ps I had an older brother and he would tease me but you know how it is... kids are cruel, that didnt help convince me I wasnt fat!

I remember still weighing decent numbers through jr high. I remember the summer before high school I went to visit my Aunt in Ontario for the summer and I dont know if I was trying to lose weight or not (I totally remember having home made chocolate milkshakes ALL the flipping time! Not very healthful!) but I remember getting on her scale at her house and I remember seeing 168 pounds on her scale. That summer I lost a bit of weight but it was cus me and Jared were out and about so much. But I do specifically remember the numbers I saw being like 163,165 and 168 I remember weighing that much at 15!! Just a reminder note for my current height 168 is my highest possible healthy weight before overweight so yes I was slightly shorter then... maybe 5'6 (i'm 5'9) but just for a comparison I was pretty much at a healthy weight then.

I dont recall my weight through highschool. However I am currently 189 pounds (well as of last WI I missed mine on monday)and I can fit into pants I wore in my senior year of high school. So my guess is I was probably in the higher 180's range in grade 12.

Now I dont recall what I weighed in my earlier years of jr high but just from the summer after grade 9 to the end of grade 12 I had gained about 20 pounds (based on the fact that I am currently wearing those pin stripe pants I just mentioned) I was never in sports as a kid, I had a wild imagination and when I was little I used to go out and play, I rode my bike places. In jr high high school I didnt have any real extra curriculars other than band and memorial club and they werent really highly active (other than the marching band, hard not to be active when you walk when you play music!) So I am betting on lack of exercising being part of why I got fat!

I dont recall many of my eating habits but I do know that I am one of those people who NEVER ate breakfast!! I know its the "most important meal of the day but I used to be so sick to my stomach first thing in the morning that I could never eat breakfast or I would be ill. Who knows if this had a serious impact on my weight or not, I would probably say yes... my aunt has a theory that my mom is the thinnest of the her and her 2 sisters because she always ate breakfast (always did still always does every single day!) I think part of my sick stomach in the mornings was nerves... once I got to high school I felt HORRIBLE every single day till i got to school... i think I was just so damn nervous to go that it literally made me sick.

On the topic of eating habits I remember many instances of when I would eat more than I needed to just becuase. Who knows if this was hard wired into my brain or what but I do recall eating more than I needed to as a kid even. I always ate really fast that I can remember. I wrote a post before I deleted everything on my blog about how I used to just have sick binges on mcdonalds at 11pm every single day of the week (I think the total was something like 38 points just for my evening meal after eating regular meals throughout the day - I only get 24 points a day at my current weight! At my highest weight I got 26) Which brings me to another point I totally ate when I wasnt hungry every single day!

It is possible that im genetically predispositioned to have these impulses to eat many people in my family have extra weight on! So I dont think I really know how to answer why I would eat so much but I know that when I was out of highschool doing the mcdonalds thing it was a lot to do with being lonely, I had one friend in town everybody else was at univeristy... a lot to do with stress too... I hated my job at the time, then after I quit I was unemployed and depresed. So clearly I know a lot of it is to do with emotions but I dont know how to explain it from when I was young.

I am sure that 2 really big things did contribute to me gaining weight. I watched my best friend die when I was 17 years old and although I knew she was sick and would die well before most people would want for somebody they love, I was expecting it and somewhat prepared. But no matter how prepared you are for a death you cant stop your feelings. I love her very much to this day and I know the after math of her death probably played a role in me gaining weight. A year and a month after Anita passed away, my cousin Jared (the one I spent that summer in Ontario with, I loved him so much, he was a year younger than me, a lot of my childhood memories that I can actually remember involve him!) was killed in a drunk driving accident. That was so much harder than Anita passing away becuase I knew she was ill, losing Jared like that was one of the hardest things thats ever happened to me! Both events really messed me up emotionally. I am sure that food was my friend during that time! From the time I was 17 (about 180-190 pounds) till I was 21 (higest weight 235.5 pounds) I had gained 40-50 pounds... it didnt happen over night and it wasnt by accident. I am sure it was my emotional eating and maybe even filling the voids in my life with food...

Right now I know its becuase of how depressing this winter is. When the temp drops below -25 there is little hope that summer is around the corner! hahaha

Why am I still fat?
I dont exercise nearly as much as I should. I have always had a problem committing to exercise, I do awesome for a while then I take too long of a break then I am at scratch again.

I still eat when I am not hungry! I also binge. Why do I do this? Somedays I dont know! I would say 95% of the time its emotional. I get the I dont care I give up attitude over whatever is bothering me and I blow it. ANd for anybody whos ever tried to lose weight we all know that when this happens you and blow it you tend to think "Well I ruined this day I will start over tomororow" so you eat like crap for the rest of the day becuase you "can" because you "messed up" your entire day in one meal... so not the case!! And usually, tomorrow doesnt come, or it comes too late when youve dug yourself deeper into the pit you have to climb out of. (But I suppose it is never really too late, it just feels that way)

On a happy note this doesnt happen everysingle day or week, I go through phases that sometimes I cant keep my hands off food... I think we all do this at one point or another

AND Why do I want to lose weight? (this is the good one)

-I want to feel good about myself and be comfortable in my own body (nothing hurts more than hating yourself!! I am freaking awesome!! I shouldnt ever feel like that!)
-I want to feel pretty (I totally hate how i look)
-I dont want to get more unhealthy than I already was
-I DO want to be as healthy as I can be (we all have to die from something, but I dont want to die from something I had the ability to control in the first place)
-I want to be a good role model (you never know who is looking up to you for help and guidance)
-I dont want to be scared to do something becuase I think/know I am too big to do it
(West Edmonton Mall - July 2007 - I was too scared to go on a ride in galaxy land with an uber thin friend because I was scared that I was too big and wouldnt be able to go on the ride and would have to suffer the humilation of getting back off to go sit on the side lines so I made up an excuse and insisted she ride alone, ps I did this more than once that day!)

And my most important reason to lose weight
- I want to prove to myself that I am so much more than I ever thought I had to potenial to be. At my highest weight I was really depressed and never thought I would even make it this far ever! If I can go all the way and get to goal and maintain and totally rock my own life then I will prove my fat self wrong. I know in my heart of hearts that I rock (I promise I dont have a big ego!) but I think that I need to do more for myself (such as staying OP and losing weight and feeling better) to be able to have something to be proud of the validate to myself that I am just awesome! Its all about accomplisment, at this point in my life losing weight is one of the biggest things I will have ever done for myself! I have been through a lot but I cant say I have ever really done anything huge for myself. I am a very giving and loving person I will easily do things for others but when I think about it there is not really much I have ever done just for the benefit of me that nobody else could do for me! If I can accomplish this... now thats special!

Now the most important question:
HOW do I fix this?

So to sum it all up:
-I GOT fat because I didnt exercise (which is also part of why I am still fat)
-I got fatter becuase I am an emotional eater and I binge eat and I had some big tradgic things happen in my life that would definitely cause me to eat
-I got fat because I didnt know how to take care of myself properly (I honestly believe this, I think that the more you learn about nutrition and proper eating the scarier your old habits become, look at the foods I ate... clearly I knew that they werent healthy but Look at what I let myself do to my body!)

No moving + too much food = Big Fat Ass!

-I am STILL fat becuase I still dont exercise
-I am still fat becuase I still binge
-I am still fat becuase I am not trying hard enough to control myself
-I am still fat because being depressed by winter blahs makes me not want to do anything!

Again No moving + too much food = A big fat ass!

So how do I fix the path that I was on, and am on.

-I NEED to start realizing that a bad day CAN end as a good day. (if you have a bad moment you can only work to make it better!)
-I NEED to exercise and stick with it, exercise keeps you healthy!
-I NEED to learn to control myself when it comes to food
-I NEED to keep my trigger foods out of my house
-I NEED to continue to plan my days, meals, exercise track my points etc

the biggest thing I need to do to continue to lose weight and get to goal

I NEED to try harder and be more strict with myself.
When I get in my "oh I ruined today" mood I dont tell myself to smarten up. If I were more strict with ok that was a bad meal suck it up and get it together for the next meal - maybe then it would be easier to prevent these week long bad eating fits.

Overall the most important thing for me to remember is I have lost 46 pounds. Thats amazing for me considering every time ive ever tried to lose weight before I havent succeeded.

A special note for all of you who have read this entire post,THANK YOU and also I dont think that I have a big fat ass! It is looking much better after 46 pounds! I just am very blunt when I write!

So I guess this is it for now... I feel oddly lighter right now so maybe I really did just need to think about why. Its good to reflect sometimes. Hopefully now I can use what ive learned and discovered today to my advantage to get back on track and get there.

What are YOUR whys?

Till next time
-C

Back To Work

2008-02-07T23:29:00.000-07:00

Its that day again, first day back to work! Which means I have plenty of time to update my blog. I wasnt really online much over my 4 days off so an update is probably due.

BFF goes back to work on tuesday for two weeks up in Fort McMurray. It is going to be lonely but I figure I will take the time to do my spring cleaning (see I want it to be warm so badly that I just pretend that spring cleaning will make spring come like ...tomorrow!) I did a little bit this week (probably worked up some AP's doing it too!) But I want to get it completed, my house as been a mess for a while as ive been too tired from working to do anything (plus winter blahs!)

I missed WI day on monday *oopsies* but I feel great so im sure that I did just fine. I will report back on monday to let everybody know what my 2 week loss/gain is.

Other than that my life has been pretty boring. I managed to pick up my pay cheque on wednesday and have all by 50 dollars spent by thursday morning (aaah bills!) I pay on my credit card and line of credit everytime I get paid so thats half of my cheque right there... this is another reason im really wanting that new job, better hours, more of them and bigger pay cheques even if I made less money per hour!

So for now I am going to wrap this one up but just wanted to let everybody know that I am still here just been on days off and when I have something interesting to say I will tell you!

Ps it was one of the girls birthdays today, there is cake AND kfc in teh fridge OH CRAP (i dont like kfc so its all good but i was craving cake yesterday)

A letter to my ass!

2008-02-03T01:43:00.000-07:00

To my lazy fat ass:

Please note as of sometime this week, preferably tomorrow you will no longer be able to be lazy or fat. If you do not stop eating like a crazy person AND start getting off the couch and moving around a little you will become even more lazy and that much more fat and that is totally 100% not acceptable.

So tomorrow when you get home from sitting down all night at work, you will go and get that stability ball you bought with the intention of exercising and blow it up and use it. Also since it is no longer -40 out you can go outside for a walk it wont kill you princess!

From 7am onward you have to move around a little each and everyday, no ifs ands or buts. Just ask yourself: "What would shrunk do?" it will solve all your lazy related problems!

If you do not comply, you are so fired
Thank-you

Management

hahaha

Ch-ch-changes!

2008-02-02T03:56:00.000-07:00

I just realized that I deleted my whole blog and I DID have some rewards for myself for when I got to a certain goal previously posted on my blog! However, things change so does my mind (and quite often at that hahaha) so I have a new list of goals (that I dont think I really had planned out that far before) and thought up some rewards that I will buy myself to reaching said goals.

My 50% there goal - New wallet and purse... why... becuase my stupid purse decided to bust the zipper on me one random morning on the way home from work (i swear it was not broken when I got in the car, it was when I got home!)

168 lbs - havent picked out anything yet but I will let you know after I hit 185... I will have to think about it haha, maybe I will go pick a new pair of glasses out or something, I will keep you all posted

152 lbs - I have no clue why I picked this number, I think its half way between healthy weight and goal weight... anyway I am going to get my hair cut and colored at this point... I need to wait a few more months for it to be long enough for me to cut all the black dye out of it (like a year and a half after the fact!)

Goal - this super cute dress i saw in the catologue me thinks, and a cute pair of shoes to match it!

I still plan on getting tattooed all to hell (haha that makes it sound like I dont want to but I do! I just like to say things differently) But that depends on money and I am not exactly rich right now!

I also plan on using the money from my change jar to try to buy a treadmill in the next few months... It will be a big investment as they are pretty expensive but canadian tire has them on sale all the time and it will be worth it, I loved having a treadmill at home when I was living with mom and dad. It will help for the cold weather days when I dont want to leave my house!

Till next time

The Road Not Taken - Robert Frost

2008-02-01T02:24:00.000-07:00

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

Goodbye January

2008-02-01T01:56:00.000-07:00

Hello February!
I am going to start this post by summing up the month of January. I decided that I needed to get my act together because taking the 2 month hiatus plus the plateau I "suffered" earlier this year has "set me back" per se. I am no further ahead but I am lucky, and thankful, that I have not gained any of my weight back. I am 100% confident that I will get to goal and be able to maintain for good!

So January 1st I said this is it, no more pop (yes sadly I did start drinking it again over xmas but today is day 31/32 of not having it again, I gave it up Jan 1st) cut back (wayyy back) on junk food and get back OP.

I didnt actually start following my points and WW until Monday January 7th but that WI I was 194.5 lbs. I am currently 189 - so for the month of January I lost 5.5 pounds! Most people who are trying to lose weight would think only 5.5 pounds but really every ounce adds up. Besides, do you know the last time I weighed anything in the 180's? I can honestly tell you it was at least 5 years ago before I graduated high school! Looking at the overall picture, 5 pounds is a big deal to me :) I am proud of myself and hope to lose another 5 pounds (or more) next month.

I am suffering a small case of the winter blahs this past week. I am having a hard time tracking but I am still making conscious decisions about what im eating and portion control. I havent written it on paper but I have counted my points in my head, tonight I know I did go over but thats ok, tomorrow is a new day and I just have to remind myself that I do better when I write everything down!

I am honestly considering planning out each meal of my day the night before so I can use my points more wisely. Today I am debating having a 6 inch sub from subway for 7 points or I could have a nice bowl of cornflakes for 3 points... Clearly i would save myself 4 points but I know a sub would be uber satisfying! But today sometime I will sit down and really think about the path I am on (I am on a good path, dont get me wrong, but I want to take the best path)

So my plan for today is to start fresh (gotta love a brand new day, and the first day of a new month!) I will re-read my materials (that always gives me a boost) and track, plan, and do my best!

I will probably update tomorrow as I am working again for the next 2 nights!

Till next time
Keep fit and have fun *queue body break music* hahaha
(this fun 80s moment was brought to you by Candace's lack of sleep for the day)
*big puffy heart*

WI day

2008-01-28T11:54:00.001-07:00

It is monday so I jumped on my scale this morning. I am down 1.5lbs this week. Hooray! 4 more pounds until my Valentines day goal. I find it totally helps to give myself time frames and since valentines day is sorta a holiday I chose that... its easy to mark off the calendar by holidays!

Not much has been going on these past few days. We went over to a friends place to play pictionary last night. It was so much fun! I havent played it since I was a little girl. Neither had anybody else in the group.

Not really doing much today as its like -40 with the windchill and ... yeah I am NOT leaving my house!! Im sure you can all agree why I wouldnt want to and shouldnt hahaha

Yay new old photos

2008-01-26T00:13:00.001-07:00

So today I had a really shitty sleep. I ended up getting up and showered and sat on the couch with BFF for a while. He was on the computer and showed me some pics from when we vacationed in Jasper in July. Well there is one of me sitting on the bed in our hotel room and my god... I am SO FAT!!! I seriously said outloud "oh my god, look at me!?!". However I am making great progress so I dont need to worry about looking that fat anymore AND I can also use it as inspiration

So congrats boys and girls you get another picture of me in a "before like state" (becuase techincally this photo is "during" however the term "before like state" will suffice for any picture I post until i get to my goal weight hahaha)

TADA:

There it is... all I can say is... WOW !

Anyway 2 more days until WI... I dont really have anything exciting to say other than Weight watchers rocks... I made burgers and fries for supper and it tasted awesome and I stayed OP so BAM take that!

Oops I just deleted EVERYTHING... on purpose!

2008-01-25T01:38:00.000-07:00

Ok So I haven't updated my blog in such a long time I decided for the hell of it to delete everything and start fresh.
First of all I was on hiatus from WW and I restarted that and got back on track... so I was thinking if I restarted WW... why not restart my blog.

So instead of having this on the side I'm just gonna post it and update goals each weigh in I guess.

Achievements
Loss to Date - 45 pounds
Started WW at 235.5 pounds - April 17Th 2007
10% reached June 5Th 2007
NO LONGER OBESE - July 17Th 2007
Onderland reached September 3 2007

Current goals
50% there/valentines day challenge - 4/9 lbs
Healthy Weight BMI (168lbs) - 4/26.5 lbs
Bday goal - 4/59.5 lbs
Labour of Love - 7.5/63.5lbs

So yeah I had rewards all picked out for when I met certain goals but things change and people become broke so for now I am just thinking them up as I go and i have decided since my purse decided to break on me (the zipper is busted) That when i hit 185lbs I will buy myself a new purse and wallet... I'm actually setting aside the money for it as I am brokeity broke broke!!

Also when I hit that point I will be down exactly 50 pounds and I shall take a new photo to add to my horrifying before photo collection so everybody can see how much better I look! Its kind of scary to think that the next time I go home to Nova Scotia I will probably be so thin that nobody will recognize me...but it will be awesome!

I am going to edit my previous photos i have posted to try to have like a side by side thing going between the 235 pound and 205 pound photos.. then when I hit 185 I will do a side by side comparison of the 235 and 185's for shits and giggles :D

There so much easier to see the before and during that way. I am sooo gonna do the same thing when i take my next update photos. So for now I am just going to leave this post at that and I guess I can try to make it a goal as well to actuallly update my blog!